Oh beautiful town

I grew up blind just like everyone’s child

In the warmth of milk and deceit

Smothered by love and the chemical dust

There was never enough to believe

They chewed me up, they spat me out

Of their system and onto their street

And the rest of my life was a sprint to forget

All the greatness that could never be

Oh beautiful town

I remember you blacker than night

The whores and the sick-mouths

The bad taste and the neon lights

Oh beautiful town

Where are you now with your binge insecurities?

I shut you down, beautiful town

Because you tear your children

Into pieces

Absence twisted with fondness

Is the horror I couldn’t forget

Programmed in the great art

Of family, lies and debts

Too much expectation

Followed by hope and then hate in the mess

And the rest of my life was a glorious test

Of my will and my selfish neglect

Oh beautiful town

I remember you blacker than night

The whores and the sick-mouths

The bad taste and the neon lights

Oh beautiful town

Where are you now with your binge insecurities?

I shut you down, beautiful town

Because you tear your children

Into pieces

On the floor boards under insolent feet

I mapped the hopscotch to my parents’ retreat

With a lavender bag in my hand

And words of desperation on my tongue

Good night father, good night mother

Are you still awake?